Bolt of Blue

In Jonny mood due to some gorgeous new photos. Nice distraction from sending off Remi today at LAX in crazy heightened security.

Merry Christmas to all who celebrate! Happy holidays all around!

I’m tired. My host had to do some kind of security upgrade and server reboots. This is the 2nd time in less than a week. And now all my fanlistings are screwed up. Joy. Their tech support haven’t been too helpful and I had to reinstall MT on one domain to get it working again. I’m sick of this. I’m pretty sure I won’t be sticking with my current host for much longer. Once the business of this month is over, I’ll have the time and energy (I hope) to make another big move. Sucks. But I know where I’ll be headed and dedicated server, here I come!

Remi is still here. He leaves tomorrow morning super early. We’ve been doing so many things. Running around getting Christmas presents, seeing friends, parties, movies. There was the 5 day LOTR line too. That was quite the success. And ROTK… let’s just say I was crying, sobbing, gasping to catch my breath, shaking, smiling, cheering for 3 and a half hours. It was a wonderful and amazing conclusion to the whole trilogy. I thought I would be upset by some ommissions (Faramir/Eowyn) but I was okay with all the changes. I know there is still more to come (extended edition). Theoden’s character was just gah! Bernard Hill did this heroic king such justice. Mirando Otto as Eowyn… she IS Eowyn. And Sam, ah Sam. That’s the Sam I know and love. All the pieces fit – the art direction, the score, the action, the drama, the acting. I can honestly say it was the most incredible movie I’ve ever seen. Words really can’t express how this movie made me feel. It’s so powerful… what stories can mean to a person’s life. Can’t wait to see it again for the 3rd time tonight on a giant Imax screen sitting next to the boy I love. Swoon.

When I picked up Remi from the airport over 11 days ago, it was like he’d never left. All the torture of missing him was gone in seconds. It really felt like I’d just seen him only the day before. It’s weird… but the last couple of days I’ve been getting blue. He’s leaving far too soon and then it will be like he was never here. And the waiting and missing starts all over again. This Christmas will be our 5th one apart. Then… no more of that nonsense. If all goes as planned, next year will be our first Christmas together… one of many we’ll be together instead of far apart.

What a strange month December has been. I feel like I’ve been put through an emotional wringer. Really, my life is pretty swell. I don’t often have much to complain about. Constantly missing my boyfriend is something I’ve chosen to take on. It sucks but I know it’s worth it. I’m very blessed. I have a good job, good family, good home.

One situation after the next was snowballing on top of one another all last week. Car trouble. Financial issues. Physical issues. Chris and Gywneth (kidding!). More drama than I care to go into because really, I’ve cried every day of December and I’d like to stop that trend today. Things have just been… bad.

I’m starting to see the light at the end of this dark self-pity tunnel. For starters, I went to 2 amazingly fun parties over the weekend. My neck pain is under control and lessening each day. I watched the extended edition of FOTR on the big screen last night. I get to see Big Fish tonight with a Tim Burton Q+A afterwards with friends I adore. I get to see PP, Mellowdrone, and others perform acoustically at the Roxy on Thursday. I get to watch TTT extended edition holding my boyfriend’s hand on the big screen for the very first time on Friday. I get to line up for 5 days for ROTK and trust me, there’s nothing like lining up with a group of wacky geeks in Hollywood who know how to have fun and cause trouble. And Christmas is coming. Remi arrives Friday for a two week visit. Yeah… things are going to be just fine.

When you’re having one the worst days you’ve experienced all year, it’s good to remember how nice November was.
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